The Truth About Trauma Responses And Ways To Overcome Them

Ever wondered why you are acting one way or another in different situations? That could be a trauma response.

They’re for sure not a one-size-fits-all, every individual has their own unique trauma responses. We experience a traumatic event and then have an emotional reaction to it. Some of us have overcome it, some are still struggling, and others don’t even realise they have it.

Trauma responses can ruin a lot of aspects in your life, such as: relationships, work-related stuff, your emotional well-being, as well as your physical well-being.

What is a Trauma Response?

Trauma response is a reaction to a perceived traumatic event. It’s like an automatic self-protecting system. They can be left off from the childhood or be created from recent events.

Whether they are conscious or unconscious, they shape our behaviours.

Trauma responses can be short-term or long-term, which means if you don’t take action, they can turn into permanent ones. Moving onto exploring the various types of trauma responses.

What are the different types of them?

Types of Trauma Responses

The classic “survival” responses, part of the body’s natural fight-or-flight system. During a traumatic event, our body instinctively chooses whether to fight, flight, flee or fawn.

1. Fight - Our body experiences an adrenaline rush, we become confrontational, angry or irritable. An unhealthy version of it would be bullying, having narcissistic tendencies, unrealistic expectations and being controlling. A healthy one would be standing your ground when someone is mistreating you. For example: someone is yelling at you for no reason, a good trauma would be to aggressively try to put them in their place. Is that a good emotionally intelligent response? No, but it is a healthy trauma response.

2. Flight - Either it’s literally running away from your problems or simply choosing to engage in withdrawing yourself from reminders of the trauma. This can be a crucial deal breaker in your relationships. The moment you sense a problem - RUN THE OTHER WAY! At first, your partner might try to do something about it, if they succeed, great, if they don’t, later on in your relationship they’ll get tired and simply leave this unhealthy environment.

3. Freeze - Feeling, stuck or numb. Being paralysed in the face of trauma or zoning-out. In the animal kingdom this is called “playing dead” or “playing possum”. A lot of the times in relationships, even when we do want to fix a problem, the moment we start to speak - a lump forms in our throats, it’s hard to do anything, it’s like we froze in time.

4. Fawn - The tendency to please or appease others: people-pleasing. Going beyond to soothe or make someone else happy, at your own expense. A healthy version of it though, could help us practice empathy and compassion for others.

The Impact

The responses of trauma not only affect your reactions to certain situations, but your daily life too, let’s dig in a little bit deeper:

• Mental Health: Trauma responses are often linked to conditions like post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), depression, anxiety or panic disorder. It is crucial for someone who has one of these to seek for help, because over time they become worse and worse, making it harder to heal and help.

• Physical Health: Chronic stress results in headaches, stomach issues, fatigue, and even heart diseases. So the saying is true that mental and physical health complement each other.

• Relationships: Not only is it hard for someone with trauma responses - trust issues, abandonment issues, low self-esteem and way more- but, one’s partner is also going through it. As I mentioned before in an example, at first they want to help, but everyone runs out of patience and feels helpless in the end, if nothing is changing.

• Emotional: Intense mood swings, feeling hopeless, or overwhelmed by minor events - are all trauma responses. This happens because of a disability to balance emotions regularly.

• Hypervigilance: After a traumatic event, your body may ****remain in a constant state of “on edge.” This means, feeling a sense of danger in safe situations, constantly scanning their environment for threats. This may lead to panic attacks.

These are just a few out of a lot.

Healing from Trauma

Fight

• Meditation is a great way to start healing from this response. Deep breathing and focusing on something else may put your mind at ease (in that moment it definitely will).

• Exercise is another great way to heal. Start healthily channeling your energy.

Flight

• Establish a safe space where you can turn to when feeling overwhelmed or anxious.

Freeze

• Stretching out your body is the move. Whether it’s yoga or pilates, maybe just stretching at home.

Fawn

• Setting boundaries is a must. For yourself and for others.

• Building trustworthy relationships with people can help you deal with fawn responses.

Few other ways you can try:

1. Therapy: A therapist specialised in traumas can will help you a lot more than me or any other article or social media post.

2. Self-care: It’s crucial not only for trauma responses, but it plays a major role in your everyday life.

3. Patience: Healing from trauma is not linear and can take time. Journaling along your way, will help you notice small victories and steps you’ve already accomplished.

Again, this is not a one-fits-all situation. Find what works for you. Maybe stretching will help your fight response, good for you!

Final Thoughts

Trauma is a thing in life, we will all encounter. It’s our choice whether we will take it down or it will take us down. No one was born ready, no one was born knowing how to overcome it, everyone came into this world to learn and evolve. What can you do right now to start healing yourself?

Remember - small steps, my friend.

“We cannot have a world where everyone is a victim. "I'm this way because my father made me this way. I'm this way because my husband made me this way." Yes, we are indeed formed by traumas that happen to us. But then you must take charge, you must take over, you are responsible.” ― Camille Paglia